The Engineer Brain

I am a builder and a creator who produces complex things, yet I find interaction with people challenging. Especially with those closest to me. I wonder if I keep people at a distance because of a defense mechanism or simply because my nature is skeptical and relies on critical thinking with measured trust. I sometimes fear I am lying to myself or that these are deep flaws.

But consider this. These are not necessarily flaws. They are the specifications of a good engineer. We are trained to identify failure modes and question requirements. We are paid to be skeptical.

The struggle comes when we leave that operating system running at home. We apply critical thinking to personal conversations and treat vulnerability like a system risk. You do not need to delete this part of yourself. You simply need to learn to toggle the settings. The same skills that build defenses can be used to construct connection.

You are a builder. You can choose to build a bridge instead of a wall.

Wooow, I run an analysis of my last 4 years journal entries with NotebookLM.

Among others, this is what it told me: “The truth is, you are a brilliant engineer with the work ethic of a moody artist.”

Now I’m considering how to take it 😂

Have you tried these kind of readers yet? mstrawberryman-ui.github.io/focus-rea…

If you stripped away the need to “feel good” or “feel ready” before working, what is the one uncomfortable action you would take on Monday morning?

that would prove to yourself that this is a business, not a hobby?

What works well when it works Works very well! ..

No?

My Headline for 2025: “My capability is constant; my energy is the variable.”

When You realize that you don’t lack the Skill or the Will. You simply lack the fuel when you neglect your biology (sleep, food, substances).

What was YOUR 2025 realization?

Life is unpredictable. There are no guarantees either way.

Things just show up (and sometimes make sense) retrospectively.

The only thing you can do is keep eyes open and play the chances. The probabilities.

Choose wisely? Choose to pursue the probabilities that have the greatest chance to materialise. And don’t be afraid to collapse the wave function.

What’s the best worst thing that happened to you?

For me, it was failing to get a couple of jobs. I’m so grateful, cause they would have derailed me and I’m in a much better place today.